


5 Times Peter Cried About Tony

by parkeratheart



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Adorable, Afghanistan, After Tony gets beat up by steve, Aftermath of Afghanistan, Angst, Ash - Freeform, Avengers 4 - Freeform, Car rides, Crying, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Hugs, I promise, I'm really bad at tagging, Infinity Gauntlet, Infinity War spoilers, Lol how many times am I going to say Afghanistan, Lots of Crying, My soul hurts after writing this, Oooh Peter saw him afterwards, Peter Parker Crying, Peter Parker Needs a Hug, Peter Quill Is An Idiot, Peter finds out about Afghanistan, Peter thinks Tony hates him, Sad Peter Parker, Spoilers, Stupid Peter Quill, That scene made my heart stop, There will be a happy ending!!!!, Time Stone, Titan, Tony Jokes Around A Lot, Tony Stark Acting as Peter Parker's Parental Figure, Tony Stark Has A Heart, Tony Stark is empathetic, Tony does NOT hate him, Tony gets stabbed by Thanos, i'm so sorry about this, lots of hugs, noooooo, reuinion, so cute, sorry Peter cries a lot, well I guess you read the title sooo...
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-09
Updated: 2018-08-10
Packaged: 2019-06-24 04:25:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 6,940
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15622500
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/parkeratheart/pseuds/parkeratheart
Summary: + the one time Tony cried about Peter





	1. I Saw You, Mr. Stark

**Author's Note:**

> This starts in Mid-SpiderMan Homecoming, just so you're aware.

“Hey, kiddo, are you okay?” Tony asked, setting down his wrench on the table and looking at Peter, who’s hands were shaking and tiny beads of sweat were running down the side of his face.

“Yeah,” Peter lied.

 

_(Tony’s left arm bloodied and cuts all over his face and bruises scattered across any skin that was showing.)_

 

“Are you suuuuure?” Tony extended the last word in an attempt of comic relief.

“N-no,” Peter admitted, sitting down on a stool and pressing his hands over his eyes. “No, I’m . . . I’m not okay.” He felt hot tears burning his eyes and his lip quivered. He sniveled and turned his head, ashamed that he might start to cry in front of Tony.

“What’s up?” Tony questioned, pushing his hands into the pockets of his grey sweats and leaning against the table, facing Peter.

“I-it’s just . . .” Peter bit his lip and then shook his head, removing his hands from his face and curled them together. They rested on his knees and he brought his head down to meet them. “It’s just every time I look at you . . . I-I . . . I think . . . I think of . . .” He couldn’t finish the sentence.

 

_(Tony swearing to Rhodey that he was alright while the nerve damage in his hands was obvious and drops of blood splattered against the floor.)_

_"I'm alright, Rhodey, i swear! I just need--"]_

_"No!" Rhodey exclaimed. "Shut up, Stark! You're not fine and you need help!"_

 

A single tear dropped from Peter’s eye and landed on the sleeve of his hoodie. “I-I can’t help but think of . . .”

_(Peter knew he wasn’t supposed to be there at that time, but he couldn’t stop himself form eavesdropping, and wished he didn’t after seeing Tony’s condition. Now the image would not leave his head.)_

Why could he not pull together a fucking sentence? Was he that weak?

 _Mr. Stark doesn’t care,_ he thought. _He doesn’t care that you’re fucking crying over this. Jut shut up, Peter, and maybe he won’t hate you for being weak._  
A hand rested over his shoulder and Peter twitched at the sudden gesture.

Was Tony . . .

. . . showing empathy?

Towards Peter?

**_Now?_ **

“Every time I look at you I think of it,” Peter blurted.

Tony’s hand transferred to Peter’s chin and gently tilted his face to meet eyes. Worry was imbedded in them. “You think of . . . it,” Tony repeated, looking slightly confused. “Okayyy, and what is ‘it’?”

Another goddamn tear fell. Peter quickly wiped at his face to remove any trace of it.

“Peter, why are you crying?” Tony asked, and Peter swore he heard Tony’s voice waver.

“It’s what . . . it’s what you looked like after Captain America nearly beat you to death.”

Tony’s face lost some of its colour and his hand left Peter’s chin and now just hovered in the air, unsure of what to do.

“I saw you, Mr. Stark,” Peter whispered.

“You saw me.” Tony ran his hand down his face and stood perpendicular to Peter. His hand didn’t make it all the way down his face and stopped right at his mouth, resting there. Tony didn’t say anything more.

“I-I’m sorry I didn’t mean to eavesdrop, b-but my senses were dialed to eleven a-and I was worried. I’m so sorry . . .” Peter was crying now. Warm tears run down his face like his eyes were faucets. “Just every time I see you, I think of what he did to you.”

He wasn’t even subtly crying either.

Full sobs echoed through the lab.

Peter clasped his hand over his mouth to try to stop them from coming and breathed heavy through his nose. His hands shook harder than before.

It only took Peter a second to stand up and walk towards the door.

But a calloused hand grabbed his wrist.

Before Peter could even turn his head, it was buried in Tony Stark’s shoulder. One of Tony’s hand was on the middle of Peter’s back and the other was pressed against the back of his head, pushing it into Tony’s shoulder.

The tears were coming at full force now.

 _Fuck, I’m crying into his shirt that’s probably really expensive,_ Peter thought, but somehow couldn’t bring himself to stop gripping the back of the shirt and sobbing like an idiot into it.

 

_(Rhodey practically forcing Tony into the MedBay with Tony loudly protesting.)_

_"I'm fucking fine, Rhodey!" Tony shouted._

_"Get in the goddamn MedBay, Tony!" Rhodey shot back. "You're_ not _fine because your hand looks like it's about to bleed out and there are fucking gasjes all over your face and your shaking like a fucking motorbike_

 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Peter cried. “I-I could have . . . could have helped.”

“No, you couldn’t have,” Tony said, not releasing and resting his chin on the top of Peter’s head. “I should have told you, and I’m sorry. But Peter, there’s nothing you could have done.”

“I c-could have come with you,” Peter sniveled. “I-I could have—” Tony cut him off.

“I’m stopping you right there. A) If you came, you might have died. And b) Don’t you **dare** try to pin it on yourself.”

“B-but you almost died,” Peter sobbed. He pushed away and looked at Tony’s eyes. “You almost d-died and if you did, I wouldn’t have gotten to s-say goodbye.”

For a moment, Tony looked like he might cry, but he didn’t. “You don’t have to worry about that. I don’t plan on dying any time soon.” He affectionately brushed his thumb across Peter’s cheeks and took any tears with him.

“I’m sorry,” Peter sniveled rubbing the back of his hand over his cheeks to take away the tear remains.

“What the hell for?”

“F-for getting your shirt wet,” Peter said.

Tony’s eyes flicked down to the wet patch on the shoulder of his shirt. It was about three inches wide. “You’re kidding me, right?” He sighed and placed his hands on Peter’s shoulders. “I don’t care about that. I’m worried about you, bud.”

Peter started to cry again.

Tony reached out to take him in for a hug again, but Peter held out his arms and stepped back. “N-no, I don’t w-wanna get it wet again.”

“Oh, Peter.” Tony quickly pulled him in anyway. “You can cry on my shirt any day.”

Peter sniffled. “M’kay.”

 

_(Watching one or two possible tears slide down Tony’s face in the MedBay and him running his hand along his face, taking away what could have possibly been tears.)_

 

And now crying into Tony’s shoulder.


	2. There's No Universe In Which I Could Hate You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I just watched Spider-Man Homecoming for like the seventh time and I'm still not tired of it. Peter's just the most adorable thing I've ever seen in my life.
> 
> Anyways, enjoy ;)

“Does my music bore you, or . . .”

Tony was giving Peter a ride to his lab to work on some updates for Karen. Any other time, Peter would have been over the moon excited, but this was the first time that they’d decided to work together since . . .

. . . since Peter screwed up so horribly bad.

 

_(“If you’re nothing without this suit, then you shouldn’t have it.”)_

 

Peter pulled his knees in towards his chest. “I-I just, well, I just . . .”

 _I just feel like a total failure to you and I’m sorry I’m a such a disappointment and you probably hate my guts and you’re just being nice to me because May probably told you that I was close to crying the night you took my suit away and you feel bad that I’m such an emotional loser,_ Peter’s train of thought wanted to say out loud, but all he said was, “I’m just tired.”

“Bull. Shit.” Tony hit the mute button on the radio and veered right. “What’s up?”

When Peter didn’t respond, Tony added, “Did you know that ‘I’m just tired’ is one of the biggest lies people tell when they’re upset about something?”

“That’s interesting,” Peter said softly.

“And did you know that those people usually say, ‘that’s interesting’ after their mentor brings it up?” Tony continued.

“No they don’t,” Peter muttered into his knees and Tony chuckled.

“Alright, enough of this.” Tony jerked the steering wheel left and they pulled over beside a park. Tony put the car in park and shifted in his seat to face Peter. “You’re going to tell me what’s up, because I can’t have a depressed teenager working with me, now can I?”

“I’m not depressed!” Peter said quickly.

“Good,” Tony chuckled. “But seriously, what’s up?”

I’m going to go die in a hole now, Peter thought bitterly. “I . . . I’m so . . . sorry.”

“For what?” Tony questioned, and then answered his own question. “You’re sorry for literally everything, even if it involves yourself getting hurt. Let me guess . . .” He pretended to think hard. “You’re . . . sorry for accidently frightening some pigeons.”

“This isn’t a joke, Mr. Stark,” Peter said.

“Okay, but I’m gonna keep going until you tell me what’s up,” Tony said.

 

_(“I lost the Stark Internship.”)_

_It’s all your fault, you made Mr. Stark disappointed. You’re such a failure._

Peter sniffled. “You . . . you hate me.”

Tony blinked twice. “Uh, no I don’t. Why would you say that?”

“Because I’m such a failure,” Peter whispered, his eyes welling up. “B-because I disappointed you when I blew up the ferry a-and now you hate me.”

“Fuck, kid, I don’t hate you,” Tony said. He didn’t pale his hand on Peter’s shoulder like he did when Peter had a meltdown in his lab. He didn’t hug him. He sat there, unmoving. “There’s no universe in which I could hate you.”

“I-I guess I already got punishment for being a failure,” Peter sniffed.

 _Oh shit, Mr. Stark doesn’t know about that yet,_ he remembered, and his blood went cold.  
  
“I’m sorry,” he cried, covering his face with his hands. Tears rolled down his face and slipped under his hands, pooling in his palms. At least Tony couldn’t see them. Sobbing was definitely not an option right now.

He didn’t look up when he heard the car door open.

 _Of course, he’s leaving you, Peter, you emotional loser. Idiot. You can’t just start crying over ever goddamn thing that’s wrong in your life,_ Peter cursed himself.  
  
But then his door opened and a rough hand gently but firmly clasped around his arm and tugged him towards the outdoors. Peter used the sleeves on his hoodie to rub away the water on his face and succumbed to the tugging and standing up outside the car, standing face to face with Tony Stark.

“I was mad at you, kid,” Tony started, placing his hands on the sides of Peter’s shoulders. “I said _was_ mad at you,” he repeated, emphasizing the word when Peter’s face fell. “But I’m not mad at you now, because you’re not a failure or a disappointment. You’re Peter Parker. The most bubbly, smart, and sweet kid I’ve ever met. So don’t you ever, ever say that again, okay?”

Peter’s throat hurt from trying to hold back his tears so much and only noticed the tears running down his face when Tony raised his hand to brush them away.

“Uh, those . . . are happy, right? Like, yay my favourite super-hero complimented me?” Tony tried to joke and seemed pleased when Peter couldn’t stifle a giggle.

“I’m just really glad that you don’t . . . that you don’t hate me after how bad I screwed up,” Peter admitted, breaking eye contact to look at the ground. “B-because you’re, like, important to me.”

Fuck, he was crying again.

“C’mere, kid.”

Soon he was in those arms again, his chest against Tony’s shoulder, this time wetting the shoulder of a black suit with tears. Tony’s hand carded through Peter’s curls.

“You really think I’m sweet?” Peter said, his voice muffled by Tony’s shirt.

“Yup,” Tony said, popping the P. “It’s so sweet how you care so much about everyone.”

“That’s nice,” Peter mumbled.

“And just so it sticks inside that head of yours,” Tony broke away and held the sides of Peter’s shoulders again. “I do not hate you. Never. I couldn’t. Because you’d just give me those big puppy eyes and I’d have to forgive you.”

“Puppy eyes,” Peter repeated.

Tony smiled and nodded, clapping his hands against where they were holding Peter’s shoulders. “Okay. We should probably get to the lab now.” He glanced at Peter’s silent tears before adding, “If you’re . . . like, good now.”

“I-I’m good,” Peter confirmed, flashing Tony a small smile and climbing back into the passenger seat.

_(“I lost the Stark Internship.”)_

_Well, take that, I got it back._

“And for the record . . .” Peter paused and waited for Tony to look his direction. “Your music does not bore me.”

“That’s a relief,” Tony said dramatically. “I was afraid I was going to get sued for my horrible music taste.”

Peter laughed.

It felt nice to laugh.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welp. That one sucked. Sorry about that. The next four won't, I promise.


	3. Eavesdropping

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm actually releasing a lot of chapters right now because I'm hella bored and these are hella fun to write so yay. Oh, and I just rewatched Infinity War for the fifth time and I still get close to tears when . . . you know what happens ;)

‘Open’ was not a word Peter would use to describe himself.

‘Closed’ would be a better one.

But Tony always seemed to have him spill his guts and tell him everything. But Tony would never ever talk about himself. He’d direct his full attention to Peter, which was nice in some ways, of course.

Peter didn’t mean to, honestly.

He didn’t mean to overhear a personal and private conversation again.

All he was doing was going behind he couch to grab a pen that had rolled under. But, he guessed that no one saw him back there, because Tony and Pepper sat down on the couch. Their conversation started out light, it really did. It was mostly Pepper grilling Tony about being safe and stuff when he was out at Iron Man.

Peter crouched back there, waiting until they left so he could get out.

But their conversation slowly turned towards Peter.

“He saw me, Pepper,” Tony said. “After the whole Sokovia Accords shit, he saw me.”

“Like, saw your condition?” Pepper asked. There was no sound for a moment, which probably meant Tony was nodding. “Are you going to tell him about Afghanistan?” Pepper suddenly said, and Peter froze.

_Afghanistan? Where he was held prisoner for three months?_

“He doesn’t need to know about that,” Tony muttered. “He doesn’t need to know about all the torturous shit they were doing to have me make that goddamn missile. He doesn’t need to know what the torturous shit was.”

“Why not?” Pepper asked, her voice hinting at confusion.

“Because . . .” Tony paused. “Because I don’t want to see him cry again. It kills me inside, Pepper. Like I actually feel like my heart is breaking in half.”

Peter pressed a hand over his mouth to keep completely quiet. _Oh shit._

“You think he’ll cry?” Pepper asked.

“Well, yeah. He cried over my . . . uh, condition after Steve beat the shit out of me,” Tony said flatly. “I can’t explain how goddamn ashamed I felt when he told me. I can’t have him know about it.”

“Alright,” Pepper sighed. “It’s your decision.”

When they finally did leave, Peter’s back was against the back of the couch, his hand still clamped over his mouth, holding back sobs while hot tears rolled down his face.

_He does think I’m an emotional loser,_ Peter thought. _He can’t stand it._

He couldn’t move.

 

_(“All the torturous shit they were doing.”)_

Tony talked a little bit about it in the press conference eight years ago. Peter still remembered watching that on TV with his aunt when he was seven.

_“Whoa, May, look! Tony Stark is still alive!” Peter exclaimed, pointing at the screen._

But he never once talked about being tortured.

Part of Peter wished he didn’t hear that.

Another part was sort of mad at Tony for thinking he couldn’t handle it, but that thought burnt away a moment after. Peter buried his face into his knees and sobbed silently, his body shaking with each one.

He wasn’t sure how long he sat back there crying his eyes out until he heard Tony’s voice.

“Kid, are you still here?” It was coming from the kitchen.

Oh shit.

Peter quickly wiped his face and hoped that his eyes weren’t red, since he had been rubbing them. “Yeah, I’m still here, Mr. Stark!” Peter called out, hoping with every inch of his soul that Tony wouldn’t come into the living room. He sprung up and sat down on the couch, trying to act casual. He saw his reflection in the TV screen.

His eyes weren’t that red, just the waterlines and there weren’t any tears on his face.

_We can work with that,_ he thought, panicked.

“Hey,” Tony greeted, sauntering in.

_Oh please don’t ask me what I’m doing,_ Peter pleaded.

“Whatcha up to?”

_Great. Just bloody fantastic._

Peter shrugged. “I don’t know. I’m bored.”

Tony raised his eyebrows. “My house bores you.” It wasn’t really a question. Tony even looked the slightest bit offended.

“What? No!” Peter laughed. The laugh was forced. “I should be getting home now.”

“Right,” Tony said neutrally and Peter stood up, brushing off his jeans.

When Peter went to walk past Tony to get to the door, the billionaire held out his arm so Peter couldn’t get by. “How come I didn’t see you walk into the living room?”

Peter’s blood went cold. “I, uh, went on the ceiling.”

Tony’s arm transferred back to his side. “Alright then.”

What he said next slipped out.

“I’m sorry I keep crying in front of you,” Peter blurted. He resisted kicking himself in the face.

Tony looked confused. “Uh, okay . . . it’s alright, kid.” Tony gave him a searching look. “Why are you apologizing?”

_Peter, you are a goddamn **idiot.** Oh my fucking God._

“No reason,” he said quickly.

_He probably already knows, considering how smart he is, Peter thought fearfully._ “Bye, Mr. Stark.”

Tony gave him another searching look, but all he said was, “Seeya, kid.”

_Omigod omigod omigod._ That slur of words was a mantra in Peter’s head as he walked out the door of the Compound.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright. I know I said that the next ones wouldn't suck, but I promise that the next three won't. I had to have this one be a filler chapter, because Peter only cries once during Homecoming when he got his suit taken away, but I've already written about that so many times over that I decided to make one like this, where it's very realistic that Peter would have a meltdown over what happened to Tony that Tony didn't tell him, if that makes any sense at all XD


	4. The Last Shred of Dignity

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> M'kay. So there is Infinity War spoilers for those of you that haven't seen the movie yet, so continue at your own risk.
> 
> For those who have seen it or for those who don't care about spoilers, ENJOY :D

Peter _knew_ the second he jumped out of it, that he should have stayed on the bus.

Especially when the Star-Guy started losing his shit and clobbering Thanos in the face, making the antenna lady lose her grip. Then Thanos grabbed the gauntlet back from Peter and tossed the antenna lady off of his shoulders.

“Oh god,” Peter said, leaping after her. He caught her in his arms and the metal spider legs shot out from his back, creating a sort-of shield to protect them both from the fall.  
We can’t win, he thought, watching everyone try to fight Thanos. He treated them like flies. Annoying creatures that are hard to kill when they’re in the air.

Alright, not his best analogy.

It wasn’t until Peter was thrown against some debris and Tony started to fight Thanos alone that he started to get really worried. Tony was a badass, but Thanos had four infinity stones, and some of Tony’s suit was already chipping off.

Peter wanted to get up and help, but his bones were aching so much that he had to stay on the ground. “Mr. Stark . . .” he squeaked. No one heard.

Then the sword-thing Tony tried to use against Thanos was ripped from its base and stabbed right into Tony’s side, all the way through.

“No!” Peter exclaimed and he felt his heart stop.

_No no! Not now. Please don’t die now!_

He retracted his face plate and watched in shock and horror as Tony was forced backwards and onto a piece of debris. Strangled sounds were coming from him and blood was dripping from his mouth. Thanos lightly grabbed the top of Tony’s head with his massive purple hand.

Peter couldn’t make out what he was saying but couldn’t see much either. His eyes were chock full of tears that were beginning to spill. “Please don’t die now,” Peter pleaded. It was almost a whisper. The tears were falling down his face in an unorderly fashion now, sliding off the metal on the Iron Spider suit. He sniffled and reached out a hand. He started to curl his fingers in to try to get Thanos away. Maybe, just maybe, it would so something.

Thanos raised his hand, making a fist and all four stones started to glow.

But then . . .

“Stop!” came Strange’s voice. Tony head turned and he made it look painful. “Spare his life, and I’ll give you the stone.”

“No,” Tony said in a strangled voice, breathing heavily.

“No tricks,” Thanos said in his deep voice.

Strange just shook his head and raised his hand, holding his index finger and thumb an inch away from each other, and in seconds, a bright green, glowing stone appeared in between them.

Peter wanted to yell at Strange. He wanted to tell him that the fate of the universe depended on him keeping that stone. But then images of Tony after Steve beat him senseless and him and Pepper talking about Afghanistan flooded his head. All he really wanted was for Tony to be happy, because no matter how hard he tried to cover it up, Tony hadn’t been happy in a very long time.

He couldn’t go out like this.

He needed to see Pepper again.

Peter needed to feel his arms around him one more time, so he refrained from comment.

The stone floated over to Thanos slowly. He caught it in his huge hand and placed it in the thumb section of the gauntlet. A burst of light shot out from him and his clenched both of his fists and roared.

Then he looked at the gauntlet and turned his hand to admire it.

As if anything could help, Star-Guy shot out from nowhere and started to shoot at Thanos with his awesome guns, giving a battle cry. It didn’t even faze Thanos. The blue stone glowed, and soon he was swallowed by a portal, having Star-Guy crash onto the ground.

Peter forced himself to stand up, supporting his weight with he debris.

He started to walk over to Tony when he heard Star-Guy say, “Did we just lose?”

 _Did we?_ Peter stopped in his tracks. _Did we just lose?_

“Why would you do that?” Tony said breathlessly, turning to Strange.

He didn’t answer for a second, but then said, “We’re in the endgame now.”

Peter flopped back down behind a big piece of what looked like concrete and started to cry hard. He wasn’t sure if it was from sadness that he had almost lost Tony or relief that he didn’t lose Tony. He pressed his palms against his eyes and let his body shale with each sob that raked through his throat.

 _Mr. Stark despises seeing you cry,_ he remembered and wiped away the tears on his face with the back of his hand. He wasn’t sure if he looked like he had been crying, but he needed to get over to Tony.

That was the last time he had any dignity about crying in front of Tony.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll give you three guesses of what comes next.  
> First two don't count.
> 
> Lol. You know what's coming next.


	5. Ash

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ALRIGHT MAJOR MAJOR MAJOR INFINITY WAR SPOILERS HERE!!!
> 
> But for those that have seen it, you know exactly what's coming.  
> And this is really gonna hurt.

Peter finally made it over to Tony, clasping his hand around Tony’s and pulling him to his feet. Peter placed his hand on the back of Tony’s shoulder. He wasn’t sure how comfortable Tony was with touch that he didn’t ask for, but he seemed fine.

Star-Guy had his arm around the antenna lady. Peter wasn’t sure if he was supporting his weight or hers. The big blue guy stood a few feet away from them.

Something echoed through the sky.

It sounded somewhat like thunder.

The antenna lady looked up at the sky, and then said in her soft voice, “Something’s happening.”

And then the unspeakable happened.

She just turned to **ash,** right under Star-Guy’s arm. He looked at the ashes in disbelief and looked at his hands, eyeing the ashes on them.

“Quill?” came the blue guy’s voice. His arm turned to ash first, and then the rest of his body just as quickly.

Peter wanted to say something, but his mouth was dry and his heart was pounding like a drum in his chest.

Star-Guy stumbled on his feet subtly and then looked at Tony.

“Steady, Quill,” Tony said, stepping forward and Peter’s hand slipped off his shoulder.

“Oh man.”

And then he was gone. He was ashes. Three piles of ashes right in front of them.

“Tony.” Strange’s voice filled their ears. “There was no other way.”

 _What? What do you mean?_ Peter wanted to say but couldn’t pull together the sentence. For a second he thought Strange might actually stay solid, but he was quickly ashes. The second that the first ash came off of Strange’s body, a massive pounding of pain surged through Peter’s body. His spider senses were going completely ballistic, but there was no danger. Thanos was gone. So that could only mean . . .

“Mr. Stark?” Peter said in a weak voice, he looked down at his hands and stumbled around for a second. Fuck, everything hurt so bad and he felt like he was going to be sick. “I don’t feel so good.”

He looked up and met Tony’s eyes. Worry flooded through them.

“You’re alright,” Tony said.

 _I am?_ Peter thought, but the pain and sickness didn’t let up. It started to increase dramatically. “I don’t- I don’t know what’s happening . . . I don’t—” he collapsed forward but found himself in the familiar arms of Tony Stark. He was being held in a lose embrace but he was gripping on strongly.

He knew what was about to happen.

Peter was going to die along with everyone else.

He was going to leave Tony and Ned and MJ.

And May.

“I don’t wanna go,” he choked out. Tears didn’t even stay in his eyes. They just poured out as soon as they came on. He didn’t apologize to Tony about accidently eavesdropping. He couldn’t apologize for not doing something when he thought Tony was about to die. Maybe if he hadn’t been the most useless human in the world, this wouldn’t be happening.

That was the main reason he was crying.

“I don’t wanna go,” he repeated, grasping the back of Tony’s shirt. “Sir, please. Please. I don’t wanna go! I don’t wanna go!” It was so stupid. He just kept saying that over and over.

He was placed on the sandy ground of Titan. Tony’s hand was cradling the back of his head and his other hand was pressed against the front of Peter’s shoulder.

The blood-red sky on Titan seemed to taunt him.

But he couldn’t go out looking at the sky.

So he made eye contact with Tony. Tears continued to run down his face, but since he was lying down, they trickled into his hairline.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered.

The pain would _not_ stop.

The last thing he saw before the world went black was Tony’s frightened eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry!!!
> 
> I know i've rewritten Peter's death a billion times in my works but it needed to be in here to fit in with the final chapter to make it hurt the most.  
> I sound so sadistic wow. 
> 
> I know this was really short, but there's only so much you can cram into a two minute scene, you know?
> 
> Again, so sorry.


	6. Peter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoo last chapter! Thanks for sticking with me this far :D

Tony wasn’t sure how long he spent sitting on the ground on Titan with the remains of Peter’s ashes on his left hand. His eyes were dry but he felt like crying. It came as a shock to see such a happy, innocent little kid begging for his life in his mentor’s arms.

And him _apologizing for dying._

“We have to go to Wakanda,” the blue skinned lady behind him suddenly said.

“Why?” Tony asked, a little more aggressively then he would have liked.

“They have technology there that might be able to help,” she said. “That’s the only place that has that kind of stuff.”

Tony just nodded, and they walked for the ship that Blue Skin had arrived in. It was a small ship, but big enough for two people and she was about his size.

“I don’t wanna call you ‘lady’ so what’s your name?” Tony said once they were off the godforsaken planet of Titan.

“Nebula,” she responded without taking her eyes off the path ahead of her.

“I’m Tony,” he said. She didn’t say anything.

 

_(“I don’t wanna go.”)_

 

Tony wanted to punch something.

He wanted to scream and cry.

He wanted to kill Thanos and make it slow and painful, look him in the eyes and tell him that he killed his . . . his _son_ and Tony was going to kill him now.

But right now, with just Nebula, that didn’t seem like a possibility.

They quickly jumped to light-speed and entered earth’s atmosphere, heading for Africa. The barrier in Wakanda was open in the front, which made it easy to land close to the huge building.

Tony knew that Thanos had done it.

He knew that he obliterated half of the universe’s population.

But it was still a shock to see Wakanda looking so empty. He saw a three people clustered around something, one of them being his Hulkbuster armor.

But then . . .

There was . . .

“Steve?” he whispered, locking eyes on the soldier.

Steve’s head turned his way. His hair had grown out and he had a beard, which Tony wanted to chuckle at, but couldn’t bring himself to find humour in anything just yet. “Hey, Tony,” he said softly.

He was standing beside a grey corpse.

_Oh my god that’s Vision,_ Tony realized with a twist in his heart. _I know he got Vision’s stone but I didn’t know he ripped it out of his face._

Steve’s cheeks were slick with tears, and Tony knew why.

Bucky.

Thanos had killed off Bucky along with half of the universe.

He felt a sickening lurch in his stomach seeing that Steve, serious and noble Steve, crying over his dead best friend.

“Tony!” the Hulkbuster armor shouted.

Tony could recognize that voice anywhere. “Bruce, hey!”

But then he saw Rhodey in the War Machine armor. “Tony? Oh my God you’re not dead!”

Tony smiled sadly. _Yeah, I’m not dead, but Peter is. It should have taken me, not him._

 

__(“Sir please, please I don’t wanna go! I don’t wanna go!”)_ _

__

 

Weeks passed, and they still had no idea how to fix everything. 

Tony’s nightmares got worse and worse as time went on. And they weren’t always accurate representations of what happened either. 

One of the worst ones made Tony wake up with tears soaking his bedsheets. 

_Peter was there, dying._

_But he wasn’t dying painlessly._

_He was dying because of a stab wound straight through his chest. He was sobbing and crying in pain and Tony’s feet were glued to the ground._

_He couldn’t get over there and help the kid._

_He couldn’t hug him and stroke his hair and tell him that he was right there. “Help me, Mr. Stark!” Peter cried. “Please! I won’t annoy you anymore, I promise! Please, please!”_

_But nothing came out of Tony’s mouth and he couldn’t move._

_“I’ll stop talking to you. I’ll do anything! Please, help me!” Peter shrieked and then blood spurted out of his wound and fell on the sandy floor of Titan. Tears stained his face and his hair was matted. He sniffled one last time. “Please.”_

_Then he was gone._

Tony didn’t wake up screaming, but waking up sobbing was not better. 

________“Tony!” came a voice from outside his room and soon Steve Rogers was standing in front of him. “Tony,” he repeated, a hell of a lot softer. “You okay?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Fucking go away, Steve,” Tony grumbled, hanging his legs over the edge of the bed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“Why?” Steve shot back. “Listen, I know you lost Peter! I know you did, and I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _

 

_(“I’m sorry.”)_

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _

 

________Tony flinched at that._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_I’m flinching at a goddamn apology. What is wrong with me?_

________“But, Tony, you have to stop pushing everyone away,” Steve said. “I know you’re exhausted and scared and hurting. Believe me, I know. But it’s just me, buddy.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________“I’m not your buddy!” Tony shouted, standing up straight. “The last time I saw you, you tried to fucking murder me. You left me to die in the cold tundra alone. Do you know how bad the nerve damage in my hand was? Almost fucking **unfixable!** And you know what else, Steve? I had to watch the one person I care about as much as Pepper die holding on to me and begging for his life!”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Steve’s mouth opened and closed like he was trying to say something for a few seconds, and what came out was, “I’m sorry about Peter.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Tony collapsed back onto his bed and pressed his palms against his eyes. “Leave me the hell alone.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Quiet footsteps sounded outside the door, meaning Steve had left._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_Don’t cry, Stark,_ he warned himself. _Do not fucking cry. You’re better than that._

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _

 

__________ _ _ _ _ _ _

 

________Another week passed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

________Tony leaned against the Wakandan girl, Shuri’s white table, peering at all of her inventions. She was just as smart as him, if not smarter. He would never admit that to anyone. She always tried to hide it, but she was so sad about losing T’Challa. Tony never really knew the guy. He fought by his side at the airport once but they never saw each other again._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_The airport._

_Peter was there._

Tony had put the kid at risk against _Wanda and Steve._ What kind of a soulless monster would do that to a kid? 

_________Steve walked up beside him and leaned against the table with Tony, who didn’t make eye contact. “What do you want, Steve?”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“I just wanted to say that I was sorry about the whole Sokovia Accords,” Steve said quietly._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

Tony barked a dry, bitter laugh. “You’re _sorry._ Wow, congratulations, Steve.” He put the most amount of sarcasm into that sentence as possible. 

_________“Do you want to talk about Peter?” Steve said suddenly, unfazed by Tony’s sarcastic comment._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

All Tony really heard in that sentence was _Peter._

_________“Not with you,” Tony snapped but Steve didn’t even flinch._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“Alright, Tony, it’s your choice, but I know you’ve been having nightmares,” Steve said, trying to hide the frustration in his voice. “All I want to do is help you.” He turned to walk out of the room._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_What else do I have to lose?_

_________“It seemed to take longer for him,” Tony sighed and Steve stopped in his tracks. “Everyone else went quickly, but he took a minute.” Steve stood next to Tony again, who still wouldn’t make eye contact. “I had just watched Strange go, and I thought to myself, ‘That’s gotta be all.’ But then I hear what once was the excited, happy voice of Peter Parker choke out my name. He didn’t even say ‘Tony’, he said ‘Mr. Stark’.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________Tony ran a hand down his face. “And then he stumbles up to me, collapses into my arms and tells me that he doesn’t want to go. He says it four times, and pleads for me to help him. But I couldn’t help him. There was nothing I could do.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________His eyes welled up._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_Stark men don’t cry!_

_________“Oh my God, Tony,” Steve whispered._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

“And then he apologized,” Tony said, his voice breaking. “I don’t know what the hell for, but he **apologized.** He apologizes for everything, but he apologized for his . . . his death.” There was no possible way Tony could keep his tears at bay when one ran down his face. It was on the side Steve couldn’t see, so that was great.  
  
  
He felt a strong hand grip his shoulder. “Wow.”   
  
“Yeah.” Tony wiped away the single tear with he back of his hand and hoped the movement was subtle enough that Steve didn’t see. 

_________Suddenly, Steve pulled him in for a tight hug they that had never once shared before._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________With Steve’s hulking size, not that Tony would ever admit this, he gave pretty fucking great hugs._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________Finally, they figured out how to get everyone back._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_Time travel._

_________Tony mentally kicked himself for not coming up with it sooner. Well, it wasn’t exactly him who came up with it. It was Shuri. The day her head snapped up and she shouted out ‘time travel!’ made Tony think of Peter._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________He’d been trying to focus but the images of Peter gripping the back of his shirt and crying kept flooding through his mind and he couldn’t push them away._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________He only cried once, during the nightmare._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

All those years of his father shouting _‘Stark men don’t cry’_ left an indent on Tony, so he didn’t even remember the last time he cried. Probably a good couple years ago. 

_________“How are we gonna pull it off?” Tony asked Shuri. Her hair was in about a hundred braids and they were tied up in a high ponytail._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________They did pull it off._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________It took a year, but they did pull it off._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________They went back in time and blew the stones to kingdom come, so Thanos could never get his hands on them._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________Even if they changed history, they still remembered everything that happened._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________And maybe everyone who died would, too._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________Steve sprinted for the forest in Wakanda just in time to see the ashes of Bucky swirling up and revealing his form. Steve stopped right in front of him._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“Do you remember?” he asked his friend._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“Yeah, man,” Bucky said, and flashed Steve a grin._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________Steve smiled sadly and took Bucky in for a hug, tears streaming down his face._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_Steve’s already lost Bucky before,_ Tony realized, watching them hold each other. He didn’t even know he was smiling until Steve looked his way and smiled back. To his right, Wanda and Vision were in huge tearful hug and to his left, Sam and Rhodey were just starting one. The weird raccoon thing and a . . . a tree (what the hell?) were holding each other and the tree kept saying ‘I am Groot’ and the raccoon would respond as if it were speaking English. 

_________Then it dawned on Tony that everyone was coming back where they died, so that meant Peter was still on Titan._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“Someone get me to Titan!” he suddenly shouted and a bunch of heads turned his way._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“Oh, right, that’s where Quill is!” the raccoon said. “Sure, I should go there, too. I’ll take you.” The raccoon waved him over and they were soon blasting off into space._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________The whole ride, Tony was jittery._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________He knew everyone remembered what happened to them, so Peter did, too. The kid suffered the most, since his death was the longest, so he’d have PTSD for sure. But Tony didn’t care about any of that._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________He just needed to see his kid._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“Here we are,” the raccoon said once they entered Titan’s atmosphere._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“I am Groot,” the tree said. Tony assumed his name was Groot._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“Yeah, me too, buddy,” the raccoon responded happily._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________It seemed like it took forever to land on Titan. But once they did, Tony’s eyes locked on a couple figures sitting on debris and rock._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________The doors opened and Tony leapt out, scanning the area for Peter._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________And then, there he was._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

But he was _crying._  
  
He was sitting on a piece of rock crying. Tony wondered with a wrench thrown at his heart if peter was crying over _him._ His face-plate was retracted, and he was facing away from Tony. 

_________Somehow, Tony thought it would be a good idea to have it be a surprise that he was there, but his heart was pounding out of his chest._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________Peter was **right there.**_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________Once he was a couple feet away, he sucked in his breath and said, “Hey, kid.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________Peter’s head snapped up and then whirled around. What came across his face was such a heart wrenching expression of joy that nearly made Tony burst._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“Mr. Stark!” Peter cried, throwing himself into Tony’s arms. Peter’s feet were lifted off the ground as Tony did a complete 360 with Peter still in his arms. He didn’t let go when he placed the boy’s feet back on the ground._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________Suddenly, all those years of Howard yelling at Tony for crying and him building a wall to keep all of his emotions locked in were forgotten._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________Tears spilled over Tony’s eyes has he hugged the kid tightly. He never wanted to let go. One of his hands pressed against the back of Peter’s head and the other was wrapped around his back. Tony’s cheek rested atop Peter’s head in his brown curls._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“I can’t believe you’re here,” Peter said breathlessly, clutching Tony so hard it almost hurt, but he didn’t care._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

“I can’t believe _you’re_ here,” Tony exclaimed, squeezing the kid tighter. He felt more warm tears slide down his face and drop into Peter’s hair, but he nothing at all mattered in the world except Peter, who was crying himself. 

_________“I’m so sorry I left you,” Peter sobbed._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________Jeez, now they were both sobbing. Tony felt Peter’s form shaking with each individual sob and cry._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________He wasn’t sure exactly how long they spent hugging, but it was a long time._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________When Tony finally released, he saw Peter’s face clearly, even through tears. His eyes were red from crying and his face was stained with his tears, but in those eyes was so much light and hope that made Tony want to burst into tears again._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“I’ve never seen you cry before,” Peter blurted out, covering his own mouth after. “Shit, that escaped. Sorry, don’t respond.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“That’s because I’ve trained myself to hold everything in,” Tony explained, ignoring the adorable things Peter slurred afterwards. “I’ve built up a strong ass wall, Peter. Made of ice. But you fucking incinerated that wall and the ice around my heart when I saw you. You’re what makes me happy every single time I see you. You can bring me out of the worst of moods without even trying. Because you’re you and there’s nothing strong enough to keep you from me again. You’re Peter Parker, the best thing that’s ever happened to me.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________It wasn’t until Peter started to sob again that Tony realized tears were pouring down his own face and Tony pulled the boy in for another tight hug again._ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

_________“I promise you, I will never let anything happen to you again.”_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

___________ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AHH THIS WAS SO EMOTIONAL AND FLUFFY I'M FIGURATIVELY DYING. And loooong. Oh well. I loved writing this chapter so much and thanks for reading my six-part story!!
> 
> <3<3
> 
> Tell me what you thought in the comments and kudos are always appreciated. :)

**Author's Note:**

> I'M SORRY this was so darn fluffy....  
> Oof, they're so fun to write, though.
> 
> Comments and kudos are always appreciated ;)


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